Reflection 9

Think of a time when you have helped someone through a tough time. Was it a good friend or someone you just met? How did you know what to do/what to say? What would you do differently if the same situation came up again?


Recently, I helped a close friend that was having trouble with the death of a loved one. The situation is, the loved one passed in the year 2008. My friend keeps having dreams of their cousin. When I asked him what they were about he replied, "It's like he never left. We're still doing the same things we were doing when he was here." So, I just decided to deal with this matter by letting him know that I've been through the same thing with a loved that passed when I was four. Then, I let him talk/vent about the whole situation with how his cousin passed. Being that his cousin's life was taken and they were more like brothers than cousins made me much more empathic to his situation. I feel that for me to help him get through this ordeal that I would have to feel what he was feeling. Further, I related to this also because my uncle's life was taken. So, I know what it is like to be left with questions and not being able to find even ground.

I am not sure how I knew what to say or do. I think just being there to let him talk to a neutral party about how he is feeling was enough for him. I say this because he feels that if he talks to his family about it then he will bring them down, also. So, having someone to confide in about having a hard time with a death, outside of the family, I feel helped him a great deal.